Today is my best bud's birthday.
Happy Birthday Mike.... incidently, today is also World TB Day!!!
Way to share your birthday with a disease bro!!
Join me in celebrating mike's birthday AND keeping up the fight against fucking TB.
Friday, March 24, 2006
HAPPY TB DAY MIKE!!
Today is my best bud's birthday.
Happy Birthday Mike.... incidently, today is also World TB Day!!!
Way to share your birthday with a disease bro!!
Join me in celebrating mike's birthday AND keeping up the fight against fucking TB.
Tuesday, March 14, 2006
A Second Shot
March 14, 10:44 am. I'm rushing...
I got the craziest of all crazy calls at work yesterday... on my work cell phone nonetheless.
My work cell phone rang at 4:50 pm, on March 13 (Doug’s Birthday… mad props to Doug), when I was just wrapping up at work. I looked oddly at my cell phone because the area code started with a four. I didn't know where it was from, but I knew it was long distance. I pondered if I should really answer the call and inflict long distance charges on some poor guy who happened to misdial. I let it ring for a little while, everyone at work was looking at me… wondering what the problem was. Curiosity got the best of me and I finally decided to answer the call.
“SaskTel, Terrence Here.”
(silence)
I speak up, “Hello?”
“Hello… is this Terrence?”
“That’s me, what can I do for you”
“This is Judy Finlay, calling for the University of Toronto, Faculty of Law Admissions….”
I’m stunned and then an overwhelming sense of dread washes over me. As you all know, I had a dismal score on my LSAT. So low, in fact, I knew I had ruined any chances I had at attending any law school in Canada… regardless of my academic record. My gut tells me that this was going to be a rejection call… thank-you-for-applying-but-you-didn’t-make-it-call. However, at the same time I also knew they had a little under 2,000 applicants every year with a rejection rate of 90.5%. Would they really call approximately 1800 people and say “sorry, u didn’t make it.” Sounds excessive. Something didn’t jive here.
“We just wanted to tell you that we received your application… and your LSAT score”
“Oh….”
“I assume you know what your LSAT score is too?”
“yeah, unfortunately, I do…. It isn’t very good, I’m expecting a lot of rejection letters soon,” I said with a morbid sense humor.
“Well, I wouldn’t lose hope just yet” she replied. “Did you apply to any other schools?”
I gave her the list:
U of Vic
U of S
U of BC
Queens
Ottawa…
and the infamous U of T.
She listened intently like she was calculating odds in her head. Strategizing… I found this odd. She replies “have any of those schools contacted you yet”
I replied, “No, my LSAT score isn’t good enough for any of those law schools… I know that”
“I wouldn’t say that…. It’s just not good enough for U of T…”
Ouch. Zing. Burn. Low Blow. My ego ran for cover. Thank you, lady… I was completely aware of that… way to drive it home.
She backtracked… “I was reviewing your application and you have a stellar academic record…”
(For rizzle… she really did say ‘stellar’… awesome)
“but your LSAT score doesn’t really reflect the rest of your application, what happened on your LSAT?”
I took a deep breath and then told her ‘The Story’. I told her how my grandmother got sick. Going to the hospital, the surgery, the survival rate of my grandmothers surgery. Visiting her in the intensive care unit… and how she died the very day I wrote the LSAT. Retelling it was like reliving it. My heart sunk and at that moment, I could’ve cared less what she had to say afterwards.
“That’s terrible, I’m sorry to hear that, that must have been difficult” she replied.
“It still is.” I’m annoyed now, I want this call to end. I wish she would spit out what she had to say and get this thing over with.
“… Well, even though the technical deadline was Feb, in light your situation and your academic record, U of T is willing to hold your application IF you rewrite the LSAT in June”
#?!?!???@@@?! … I didn’t saying anything, I just gasped. I suddenly found it hard to breathe.
She pauses, “don’t make a decision yet, I will email you, and call me when you have decided”
The call ends.
The hugeness of the situation overwhelms me. I’m babbling… people at work stare at me. U of T! The premier law school in Canada. Industry leaders, political giants, and Prime Ministers have graduated from that school. U of T standards rival schools like New York, Stanford and many Ivy League law schools… picked my application… out of thousands… to give me a second shot.
Un-fucking-believable.
It’s been 18 hours since the call
I barely slept.
I'm still rushing...
I got the craziest of all crazy calls at work yesterday... on my work cell phone nonetheless.
My work cell phone rang at 4:50 pm, on March 13 (Doug’s Birthday… mad props to Doug), when I was just wrapping up at work. I looked oddly at my cell phone because the area code started with a four. I didn't know where it was from, but I knew it was long distance. I pondered if I should really answer the call and inflict long distance charges on some poor guy who happened to misdial. I let it ring for a little while, everyone at work was looking at me… wondering what the problem was. Curiosity got the best of me and I finally decided to answer the call.
“SaskTel, Terrence Here.”
(silence)
I speak up, “Hello?”
“Hello… is this Terrence?”
“That’s me, what can I do for you”
“This is Judy Finlay, calling for the University of Toronto, Faculty of Law Admissions….”
I’m stunned and then an overwhelming sense of dread washes over me. As you all know, I had a dismal score on my LSAT. So low, in fact, I knew I had ruined any chances I had at attending any law school in Canada… regardless of my academic record. My gut tells me that this was going to be a rejection call… thank-you-for-applying-but-you-didn’t-make-it-call. However, at the same time I also knew they had a little under 2,000 applicants every year with a rejection rate of 90.5%. Would they really call approximately 1800 people and say “sorry, u didn’t make it.” Sounds excessive. Something didn’t jive here.
“We just wanted to tell you that we received your application… and your LSAT score”
“Oh….”
“I assume you know what your LSAT score is too?”
“yeah, unfortunately, I do…. It isn’t very good, I’m expecting a lot of rejection letters soon,” I said with a morbid sense humor.
“Well, I wouldn’t lose hope just yet” she replied. “Did you apply to any other schools?”
I gave her the list:
U of Vic
U of S
U of BC
Queens
Ottawa…
and the infamous U of T.
She listened intently like she was calculating odds in her head. Strategizing… I found this odd. She replies “have any of those schools contacted you yet”
I replied, “No, my LSAT score isn’t good enough for any of those law schools… I know that”
“I wouldn’t say that…. It’s just not good enough for U of T…”
Ouch. Zing. Burn. Low Blow. My ego ran for cover. Thank you, lady… I was completely aware of that… way to drive it home.
She backtracked… “I was reviewing your application and you have a stellar academic record…”
(For rizzle… she really did say ‘stellar’… awesome)
“but your LSAT score doesn’t really reflect the rest of your application, what happened on your LSAT?”
I took a deep breath and then told her ‘The Story’. I told her how my grandmother got sick. Going to the hospital, the surgery, the survival rate of my grandmothers surgery. Visiting her in the intensive care unit… and how she died the very day I wrote the LSAT. Retelling it was like reliving it. My heart sunk and at that moment, I could’ve cared less what she had to say afterwards.
“That’s terrible, I’m sorry to hear that, that must have been difficult” she replied.
“It still is.” I’m annoyed now, I want this call to end. I wish she would spit out what she had to say and get this thing over with.
“… Well, even though the technical deadline was Feb, in light your situation and your academic record, U of T is willing to hold your application IF you rewrite the LSAT in June”
#?!?!???@@@?! … I didn’t saying anything, I just gasped. I suddenly found it hard to breathe.
She pauses, “don’t make a decision yet, I will email you, and call me when you have decided”
The call ends.
The hugeness of the situation overwhelms me. I’m babbling… people at work stare at me. U of T! The premier law school in Canada. Industry leaders, political giants, and Prime Ministers have graduated from that school. U of T standards rival schools like New York, Stanford and many Ivy League law schools… picked my application… out of thousands… to give me a second shot.
Un-fucking-believable.
It’s been 18 hours since the call
I barely slept.
I'm still rushing...
Tuesday, March 07, 2006
Gut Check
Its 3:20 am on Tuesday March 7th. It's my sisters b-day and, incidentally, tomorrow will be mine.
I still have trouble sleeping. I'm tired drowning in my own grief and self-pity. I've been numb and unhappy for a better part of 8 months and in the last month, life stomped on me.
In the last nine months I let myself entertain unrealistics wants. It eventually tore me apart. I wanted to go to law school. I wanted to get into management. I didn't want to leave Regina. I didn't want to leave my family. I didn't want to leave my friends.... the list goes on.
I need to let go... Its time to sacrifice
It starts here. No more excuses. I have failed... I have failed miserably but failure is temporary.
I will not put my life on hold forever and I am willing to fail and embrace rejection as many times as need be!
These are my goals:
You will be my witness... my accountability. I have announced it. I can't imagine anything more humilating than failing in front of an audience. I'm ready for the consequences. No excuses.
This is no journey, there will be no first step. This is a war.... a bloody fight to the bitter end.
This is my comeback.... THE comeback. No Plan Bs. No escape.
Time to pick a fight...
I still have trouble sleeping. I'm tired drowning in my own grief and self-pity. I've been numb and unhappy for a better part of 8 months and in the last month, life stomped on me.
In the last nine months I let myself entertain unrealistics wants. It eventually tore me apart. I wanted to go to law school. I wanted to get into management. I didn't want to leave Regina. I didn't want to leave my family. I didn't want to leave my friends.... the list goes on.
I need to let go... Its time to sacrifice
It starts here. No more excuses. I have failed... I have failed miserably but failure is temporary.
I will not put my life on hold forever and I am willing to fail and embrace rejection as many times as need be!
These are my goals:
- Score between 160-170 on the LSAT
- Get accepted to a Law School that has a international law or human rights program
- Find a job that pays equitably (that i wouldn't mind doing) even if it is not in Regina.
- Move out... even if it is outside of Regina and Saskatchewan
- Get back down to 175 lbs
- Let go of my grief
You will be my witness... my accountability. I have announced it. I can't imagine anything more humilating than failing in front of an audience. I'm ready for the consequences. No excuses.
This is no journey, there will be no first step. This is a war.... a bloody fight to the bitter end.
This is my comeback.... THE comeback. No Plan Bs. No escape.
Time to pick a fight...
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